Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Heaping Dish of Dysentery?

I'm sitting in the crapper for the 4th or 5th time at work...*Note to self---no more Kung Pao and Corn Pudding* and it's the weekend, so there's an attendant in the bathroom. Ya, this casino is high end. Anyway, I've got time to kill while my intestines are slowly making their way to the pristine commode and the man that is attending the restroom is striking up a conversation with who the hell knows and here's the conversation:

"I miss the faucets that you turned on yourself and towels that you had to hand crank to get the towels out and toilets you actually had to flush by hand...blah, blah, blah"

*See at our high end casino, everything is pretty much automated with the exception of wiping your own ass*

My thought: Gee, you know what I miss? Polio. Hey, dumbass! We're trying to prevent the spread of germs! It's bad enough people HAVE wiped their own ass and didn't wash their hands and then go into the kitchen and cook and now YOU actually know the frequency of my bowel habits today!

I wonder what kind of tip you'd have to leave the attendant to get him to wipe your ass so he won't be so bored and lonely and he can go wherever and spread my dysentery.

2 comments:

Tam said...

Depending on the place, I actually REFRAIN from washing my hands sometimes. Especially a walmart bathroom. I tend to pick up less germs NOT touching the faucets in places like a Peach Street Walmart restroom. That's right. I said it.

Sup, bro?

Ron said...

Hey, piss is sterile. Just piss on your hands instead of washing them - You'll kill germs AND have that fresh "Smells like hobo" feeling!